I've been sitting here for the past 10 minutes wondering what I should write for today. Have you had one of those days where your mind's just blank and nothing seems to be oozing out from there? I've had plenty of that and today is no exception. Nothing. Blank..blank..and blank.
I'll try nevertheless. The hubby gave me a holiday this evening. **jumps..no, flies for joy**. He took the girls and left the building. They've left and are on the way to MIL's for dinner. THe grandparents miss seeing the girls. We have not been there as often as before because we didn't want to give the old folks more work to do. Lil Em will be chasing after FIL wanting him to carry her and because he can't, she'll get annoyed and start doing the 'bollywood' on the floor. Besides, she's extremely cranky lately because she's the flu (cough and cold).
Speaking of FIL, he's doing fine with each passing day. The test results from his prostate came back negative for cancer; so that is a huge relief for us all. He needs to get his act together and start to really take care of himself. But you know how it is with the old folks - they get more stubborn as they age. So, there's really so much we can do in terms of getting him to take his meds, drink more water, eat more healthily etc...
And, what am I doing home? Oh..heheh..just chilling. Technically, I have been 'chilling' all day since the hubby's home today. It's a national holiday. But, now, the "chilling" is quieter and calmer. When the 2 of them are together, it's havoc. I don't blame Ash cos she's ok. On the other hand, I can't blame lil Em either because she only has one goal in mind right now and that is to have ALL that the sister is having. It can be a pain at times. So far, Ash has been pretty accommodating whenever we tell her to 'give it up' to her sister but sometimes, I feel it's very unfair to Ash. Why does Ash have to give in every time the sister wants something? It has to go both ways, doesn't it? Hmmm..is it strange that I feel this way about them when Ash hasn't really shown any signs of...urm...rebelling? The worst is, whenever lil Em decides to give Ash a big punch on the face or a good whack on the hands with whatever she's holding. It's as if it's ok for lil EM to do it because she seem to be doing it all the time and will only stop whenever I stop her or when Ash yells out "OUCH!!!...Stop it". And Ash knows that she has to consciously be gentle with her sister because we always tell her so. She has asked us "why not mommy?". She cannot articulate well but I know, she's trying to ask me "why not mommy; why mini can and Ashrli cannot?". So far, she is pretty receptive of what we tell her whenever she asks us. But, I don't know why I have this unsettled feeling; this feeling that one day Ash is not going to accept what I or we tell her and one day she will rebel or fight back. And I am worried that I won't be able to handle it when it happens. You know, I don't really want to impose; but rather, I want to explain to them so that they understand the things that are going on. I feel that chances for them complying would be best if they understand. I don't know, I may be in over my head in wanting to create or have this ideal situation. Perhaps, some things will and do not have any explanation and that they just have to trust us that as their parents, we will and are doing the right thing (or at least, we try our best to).
