Tuesday, August 10, 2010

more changes

So, hubby went into work this morning to get some things done before heading out to the hospital to get his mom. MIL spent the night with FIL last night but from what I heard, neither could sleep because they had a very chatty neighbor. That's the thing with a 4-bed room, if any one of your neighbors decides that it's too early for bed, nobody sleeps! The old patient was calling out for the nurses like 100 times and kept on talking really loudly in the middle of the night, presumable about his company's business : supplying steel for steel building. It got so bad that the nurses had to wheel him out of the room so the rest could sleep. Poor fella.

Hubby left work around lunchtime so he could bring MIL home to change, shower and simply get some rest. She needed it badly cos when she was at our place on Sunday, she hardly slept a wink. She hardly ate too; her mind pre-occupied with my FIL. Can't exactly blame her because he is after all close to 80. But, thankfully, everything went well and according to hubby, he seemed much better today after the surgery. Guess FIL is just so so glad that it's over.

But, we're still waiting for results of certain tests he took. Hubby asked for a thorough check-up on his dad. Just to be sure. So far, we've found that he has cataracts. He must've had it for a while now but you know, that's the thing with him; he doesn't want to get anything checked. I kinda feel that he's just scared...scared to know reality I guess. And knowing him, he just doesn't want to worry anyone, not wanting to trouble anyone. Just like that night, he couldn't urinate the whole night and yet at 4am in the morning, he drove out with my MIL to look for a 24-hour clinic. Can you believe this man? Later, we found out from the doc that he's not even supposed to drive with his condition!!

See what I mean about a 'change' coming about. I don't think we can leave them alone any longer because MIL doesn't know how to drive. But, even if she did, they can't be alone. I don't want to speculate about what we're going to do because we haven't talked about it yet. We'll probably discuss it with them later. I won't lie to you but it's all a little unnerving. I honestly don't know how to care for the elders. Sometimes, I don't even know how to take care of myself. Know what I mean? OK...I am thinking too much, too far ahead. I shall just focus on the kids first....but I can't help it!!

8 comments:

Bryan and Brandon's Mama said...

Take it one step at a time. Don't plan too far ahead.

Cynthia said...

hi shireen, have been following your blog, but I can't remember how nor when I first came upon it. I'm still relatively new at this. I can however, relate to your latest post. I have an 89 yr old grandma staying with me, my mum is not entirely well and my dad is her full time carer. I want to be all to the people I love, with my own immediate family my first and foremost, but I know that I can only handle one thing at a time. So don't jump the hurdle to think too much (although there is no harm in forward planning), focus on your kids and hubby, and take each stride as it comes. Take it easy.

Ann said...

I know how you feel. Just that day I thought and felt a feeling that I have never had to deal with elderly before.

Change is always 'risky'. But when things get into routine, then would be better.

All the best.

mott said...

Ah..my dear, take it easy k. I know, suddenly taking care of elders is very daunting. I too have that great fear. The elders are heavier than lil kids. You can't just pick them up and get them to sit in one corner.

Whichever way this goes, just tell yourself, you're stronger than you think you are..and you can get through it!

Mamapumpkin said...

Sorry to hear about your FIL. Hope he's recovering well & that hubby is not too stressed about it. There are many options caring for old foggies but aiya, at worst case, just open up that secret extra compartment in your heart & the rest will follow. *big hugs*

Jen Cheung said...

hope your FIL is feeling better lah. look at the love between MIL and FIL eh. so loving and caring lah!!! so envy!!! take good care!!

jen

mom2ashleyaidan said...

Hey Shireen,
whatever it is , God wouldn't give you anything you can't handle. Gd luck and I hope things work out for u and your family. Gd idea to focus on your kids now:)
Have a blessed week!
xoxo d

mom2ashleyaidan said...

Hey Shireen,
whatever it is , God wouldn't give you anything you can't handle. Gd luck and I hope things work out for u and your family. Gd idea to focus on your kids now:)
Have a blessed week!
xoxo d

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